je t'ecris, je t'ecris... [05 Oct 2005|02:02pm] so I'm going to have lunch with hillary in about an hour, which put me in an animorphs mood, so i was looking up quotations, and found an "you know you're obsessed when" list which was FABULOUS- though some were stupid and not well thought-out, so I cut them off...I had to post the highlights- here are the especially amusing ones: ) You start talking like Ax. Ax-ca. Ca. Ca-uh. 6) You dream about Animorphs. (Especially about the sea. And a voice, calling out to you from beneath the water.) 16) You have a dog named Homer, a cat named Dude, and a rat named David. 17) You stand outside holding a sign about the second coming of Elfangor. 18) You go outside after the rain and stomp as many slugs as you can see. 19) You've cleverly infiltrated the basement of your school. 20) You plot to destroy Dealin' Dan Hawke's and Frank's Safari and Put-put Golf. 21) That alligator at your zoo has a whole new look. 22) You wish to perform lay-burr in order to obtain delicious cinnamon buns. 23) You've investigated every single "King" in the phone book. 24) Your calendar says, "Sario Rip" instead of "Daylight Savings Time." 25) You write threat letters to Jonathan Taylor...ahem, Jeremy Jason McCole. 26) You laugh hysterically at the serious Area 5...ahem, Zone 91 documentaries. 27) You call your travel agent for a trip to Royan Island. 28) You're immediately suspicious of anyone named "Aria". 29) You no longer send any toy vehicles to the Goodwill. 30) You've visited the North Pole just to see Nanook. 31) You watch The Nanny more often, for Fran "The Iskoort" Drescher. 32) You wiggle your ears to the music of "The Lion King". 33) You shop Ebay for the Kitchen Droid. 34) You never, ever touch a hamburger since #28. 35) Your favorite parts of televison are "These Messages". 36) You hear FedEx trucks talking to you. 37) You know the Better Business...ahem, Buyers Research Institute's building plans quite well. 38) You've written a critique of your favorite restaurant's nonexistant T-Rex meat. 39) You wake up in the middle of the night screaming "Crocodile not alligator!". 40) You've found the bark on trees outside your house is not quite as tasty as you once thought. 41) Not bad. Not bad at all. This speaks for itself. 42) You've stabbed your older brother's ear with a Q-Tip. 43)You want to go to Mall Of America. It had around 5 to 8 bookstores! More places to look for Animorphs! 44)Also hoping to find Rachel there. 45)You stick youself in your school locker, trying to morph, and...oops! You're stuck in your locker, especially when you also get disappointed on not morphing. 46)You try to aquire your dog or cat. 47)Then run to your room, concentrate, and you're disappointed when nothing happens. 50)You want to take Galard instead of French, German,Spanish, etc. 51)You go to the Gap to find the Yeerk pool entrance. 52)You're suspicious of your Vice Principal. 53)You've tried to shove a plastic Yeerk in your sister's ear. 54)You oppose the stuffed red-tailed hawk in your libary. 56) You've tried to build a hologram emitter. 59) You saw a rat on a small island, come back with a baseball bat, screaming, "Die, David, die!" 60) You've tried to figure out where the Animorphs live. 61) You've mistaken your knife rack for a Hork-Bajir. 62) You've mistaken an octopus for a Leeran. 64) You've walked to abandoned constuction site, waiting just for an Andalite. 65) You've broken into the zoo, hoping to aquire a tiger, only to find out it's dinner time. 67) You've stomped Nesk :::cough::: ants to the ground. 69) Your small talk begins, "So...inhabited by any good ixcilas lately?". 71) You've caused a scene at Williams-Sonoma in the past month. 74) You've been arrested for trying to burn down Bill Gates' mansion yet again.   1 BOUQUET | SEND A ROSE

portal disabled....yet another laugh in the face of space-time [05 Oct 2005|11:09pm] It's so annoying when you need to think. There's noise everywhere, even when there's none of what one would conventially call noise. There's noise in the absence of noise. And it's compressing, filling, and distracting. I can't think with so many others thinking so loudly around me. And I use the word "thinking" loosely, for really, who thinks anymore? As technology advances we are driven further and further into selfishness, introspect. Does anyone contemplate life outside this planet, this solar system, this galaxy? Does anyone attempt to picture a thread of space-time, the infinite alterations and implications in a single loop or twist or snap? Do the Fates truly hold that ethereal pair of scissors? There's too much lack of thought here, and it's so so so loud, and so hard to push out of the way. At home, when I'm outside, alone, before the neighbors are out, I can push away the rambuctious nothingness, walk, and contemplate without interruption. I haven't been able to do so in a long time. And so here I am, at my keyboard, attempting to reach once again that levle of thought that is meditative, precognitive, imperfect, imperative- archaeic and old and new at once. I dream almost nightly of swinging, sometimes from an invisible rope, and it makes sense. But there's so little time and opportunity to dwell upon it properly and analyze what is being put before me. We as humans barely value time for what it is. Oh, it's irrelevant, really. It passes, in its continuum, a conundrum of strings, a ball of yarn, moving and spinning. But true thought, that state of allowing the mind to leave the pathetic physical constraints we have seems to be a lost art. The few who practice it or attempt to are shot down with bigotry and simple lack- of thought, of understanding, of compassion. Applegate was right, it IS all a game. We are all mere Ketrans waiting to interface, waiting to take part in it. But is there an Ellemist? The whole idea of that deep thought revolves around the idea of there being no true power other than that of life itself; so, in the theory of nature, there is no Ellemist, there is no Crayak. But who, then, is responsible for the wars that are going on? And who for stopping them? Are we truly capable of either ourselves? I'm so glad I'm going home this weekend. I need to sit under the stars. I need to feel the morning dew. I need to get away from this migraine of compressed minds, of minds who lack the ability to see beyond the next day, the next race. And maybe I can't see, either. But I do catch an ocassional glimpse of understanding, and, when I do- it is bliss- and terrifying. Some say ignorance is bliss; but that must be untrue, for most of our species is in ignorance, and hardly blissful. No, bliss is rest, peace- and to achieve that we must think. And that, faster than anything else, we are losing. A dieing art; a lost breed. In the relativity of time, we are already lost. So what is left to dream? For a small portion of an algebraic equation of equity, what matters? Who wins the game, and who loses? By what rules do we play? All I can say is this: in the end, it is the collective that chooses, as is the case for all things, both living and not. Life surpasses death, for death is singular and life is multiple. An endless dance of the two, a hybridized melody which ultimately ends in peace. The only question is- how to achieve it, who will do so, and when will that be? Will it be a day we live to see?   3 BOUQUET | SEND A ROSE

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